Infatuation is a pivotal aspect in a little game called “getting to know you.” It highlights the traits that you will probably enjoy the most in this person and helps tremendously in bonding with those who were once strangers.
Now, you’ve put in a good amount of time with your significant other, maybe a few weeks or months have been invested and its been blissfully surreal. You wake up yearning for them, at night you dream of them, and during the day they are all you think about, or maybe the two of you are completely joined at the hip.
Then his jokes aren’t as funny as they were two weeks ago. Her favorite playlists no longer earn your head nod. You find out they prefer ketchup on their eggs, something you believe to be a deal breaker – who is this person?
Like most romances, you have finally reached the end of the phase of infatuation. Despite the intensity and passion that comes along with infatuation, we are gradually, or even suddenly, knocked down from the exquisite love high that is felt. Discussing your childhoods, families, and past relationships will be intriguing and exciting. We may come to realize this person can enlighten you when it comes to life and maybe even yourself. In due time, however, you may find their conversation becomes mediocre. It is also possible that their habits, let’s say chewing with their mouth open, constantly texting while spending time together, or my personal favorite, snoring, might be pretty high on your list of pet-peeves.
Up against your heart and your mind, this is merely a point of decision-making. Moving past the infatuation phase is not something that should cause you to run away from this new development in your life. Once you find yourself seeing this person for whom they really are, ask yourself if this is what you really want. This will bring you to the moment where you pause, learn to accept, make requests, or make sure your “fall back game” is strong, but considerate. Hurting this person’s feelings or showing resentment is not the right way to go about losing the sensation that was once felt.
This first of many stages of a relationship is what you are fed in romance novels and movies right up until the cliché “and they lived happily ever after” occurs. In reality, happily ever after rolls in with frustrations, disagreements, and many discoveries about our partners. Some that may contradict what you think you already know or feel toward this person. No love can prosper without effort. It will take more than lust and fascination for your relationship to thrive. So if you wake up one morning to discover a shift in your infatuation toward your partner, believe that patience and acceptance is key.