“You was the best of all time at the time though” – Taken from “30 Hours” (Kanye West)
We’ve all found ourselves at one point feeling like this. In this final installment of Love After Heartbreak I want to talk about not being a prisoner of the moment. You can read last week’s installment here. There are many Kanye-isms that I live by. His albums have provided a soundtrack to my life along with many other artists. The quote above inspired the direction I wanted to take this last piece.
When we fall in love, usually we believe that this is it.
No one quite compares to that current person. They were the best of all time quite honestly. Once that relationship ends you’re usually in some sort of awe. How could something end that just wasn’t supposed to?
That shock factor stems from falling in love with the moment.
If you’re going to love then you should love in totality. Love fully and unapologetically. But in the future, you must remember that anything is possible. Love is knowingly opening yourself up to the unknown. That unknown can be the highest of highs or the lowest of lows.
Upon a breakup it’s now important to view your former relationship as a moment. It was an experience. It was a lesson. That person that you were with was the best of all time at that time. That shouldn’t be a new idea to most of us. If we’ve ever been broken up with before and have tried to get back, usually that person doesn’t reciprocate the sentiment like they used to. They have moved on to what they feel was a better fit for them. You too can become the best of all time at that time.
In the wake of relationships, viewing them as moments and lessons can help.
They help you pay attention to how you can operate in the future. They help you see where things went wrong. They also allow you to not allow yourself to compare new people to the old ones. That’s probably one of the more common issues in dating again. It’s the struggle of the new interest living up to how the former made you feel. We can’t get caught up in that when we’re looking to move on.
Saying that someone was the best of all time at one time is you actually being honest with yourself. That’s where the root of getting over someone lies. Be honest about whatever the harsh truth is. They were a moment and you’re still here. You can still find the best of all time for all time. You can only do so though by approaching dating with a “can do” type of attitude.
I hope this series can be a Steve Nash assist for you all in dating. Share with all you know and please let me know your thoughts. Don’t be a prisoner of the moment, know that it can and will get better. That choice is yours though.
These are my words and I make no apologies.